The Vital Importance of Knowing the Difference Between Goals and Rewards

 

Until recently, I was like most people and thought that a goal was an end result. I used to say things like “My goal is to publish six books this year,” or “I’ve made it my goal to go for more walks.” But it turns out that I didn’t understand what a goal actually is.

The late, great Buddhist teacher, Thich Nhat Hahn, understood goals perfectly when he said that when washing the dishes, you should wash the dishes to wash the dishes, not to have clean dishes.

At first that looks confusing because you have to wash the dishes in order to have clean dishes. So what was he talking about?

He made that statement when he was talking about mindfulness and the importance of keeping your mind in the present moment. He was saying that to have clean dishes, your goal must be to wash the dishes, to think only of each dish as you clean it. As he put it (and I paraphrase), clean each teapot and cup with as much care and attention as if you are washing the baby Jesus himself. Your reward for such diligence, is clean dishes. But if all you think about is wanting to get the cleaning over and done with then the dishes may to be done properly.

The goal is to clean each dish. The reward is clean dishes.

But, you may be wondering, what does this have to do with writing?

Well, goals and rewards work the same way in any situation, even with writing.

What you need to do is figure out what it is you want to achieve with your writing. It can be a short or long-term achievement. It might be to write and publish a book every two months, or even to earn $30k a year as a freelance writer, or become a ghost writer, or a high-earning blogger, or a short story writer.

Whatever it is, first you have need to know what it is you want (reward), and then you have to plan exactly what you need to do to achieve it (goal).

So say you want to write and publish a book every two months. You have to know how many words you can write in an hour and how long it takes to edit proof and publish a book. Once you’ve figured it out then you know how many hours a day you need to work. And if you work your plan you’ll reach your goal which is to have a strong daily work ethic.

Your goal is the plan you made for daily/weekly writing. The reward is having a book written and published every two months.

So just like washing the dishes to wash the dishes, not to have clean dishes, your goal is to write the books to write the books, not to have the books written.

And the reward will come if you stick to your goal.

The 12 Month Writing Challenge
Write and Publish 12 Books in a Year
https://www.cheritonhousepublishing.com/books/12MTH.html

Why You’re Not Writing and How to Fix it

 

I recently admitted to you all (to my subscribers) that I haven’t been doing much writing lately.

I’ve had a lot going on in my life for the past several months, and most of it was not good and was either emotionally or physically demanding. But it was still no excuse for not writing. Sometimes a week or more would go by without me writing a word. And it bothered me. I wanted to write, so why wasn’t I writing? I didn’t understand it.

Then one day I was reading a book by Kristine Kathryn Rusch called, How Writers Fail: Analysis and Solutions.[This book can only be bought as part of a series https://amzn.to/426rfQ9] It was fascinating (and I read it several times), and one thing in particular struck me.

Kristine is married to author, Dean Wesley Smith, and she said that he cannot write without a deadline, even if it’s just a self-imposed deadline. And I realised that was my problem too. I had no deadlines.

I was overwhelmingly busy with so many other things going on, including selling our apartment, packing up everything we own, looking for another property to buy and finding nothing suitable so having to quickly rent a house and unpack everything we own. So I’d jettisoned my writing because other things seemed more important, like being days away from being homeless. But I still should have sat down every day, at least for an hour, and written. But instead I did nothing. No writing.

The problem with being human is that when faced with a choice, we default to the easiest thing to do, with is usually watching TV or playing a computer game, while telling ourselves that we deserve a rest.

When you have a job to go to every day it gives you a deadline to work to. It always gives you deadlines at home too because your time is limited.

But it’s too easy to put things off if there are no deadlines looming. When I put off my writing, it felt like there was little consequence because no one knew I hadn't done it and I still got plenty of other things done.

We always put off doing things we know we have to do if there isn’t a deadline, even things like washing the car, exercise, cooking, and even going for days out. It’s always easier to do nothing. Yet we always feel better if we do what we’re supposed to do.

It’s also a matter of priorities, the things you deem important enough that you’ll do them no matter what.

Some people aren’t even aware of their own priorities. It see parents at the park staring at their phones instead of interacting with their kids. Dogs not walked, dirty homes, unmade beds. All of it leads to depression.

Many studies show that productive people are happy people. They have a sense of achievement and have everything they want because they get things done. And it works the other way around too. Not only are productive people happy, but happy people are said to be 13% more productive. But productivity shouldn’t be confused with being busy. People who are busy all day, are said to be miserable. There is also a correlation between happiness and having a job. According to the World Happiness Report (WHR), having a job is a major step towards happiness.

So your writing has to be a priority or it won’t get done, and you’ll be unhappy. To get it done you need a schedule and deadlines.

I organise my days for everything I want to get done that day, and I do it whether I want to or not. If I didn’t, I’d be miserable, just like I have been these last few months when I wasn’t writing.

I have a publishing schedule for everything I write, including blog posts and books. Freelance work always comes with deadlines so that always gets done on time. I already know that I have to finish my latest book by the end of this month. I also have other writing projects to do, as well as all my chores and obligations in my personal life.

And deadlines, like having to finish my book in three weeks, keeps me on track every day.

I definitely need deadlines, as I proved to myself recently.

And having a schedule and deadlines means I know what I’ll be working on every day, meaning I can get straight down to work with no time to procrastinate.

Now that’s what I call a win-win.

Cheriton House Publishing
https://www.cheritonhousepublishing.com
Books on writing and self-help

Your Time & Talent Are Worth Money

I have never worked for free. If someone wants me to do work for them then I expect to be paid.

Why wouldn’t I?

Likewise, if I write and submit my work to a website or publication, I expect payment if they want to publish it.

I’m a hardworking writer so I should benefit from my hard work. People should respect what I do and if they want to make money from what I do they need to pay me.

Yet I come across so many writers who think that it’s normal to write and not get paid. They think that writing for free will mean they have clips to show an editor, or that giving their work away for free will get them exposure.

Cheapening yourself this way will not get you the job. If you have no confidence in yourself, neither will anyone else.

If you want to negotiate a price, that’s fine. But at least have a price to start with.

And this belief about the necessity to write for free is getting worse. Nearly every day I see a new writing scam on social media or on freelance writing websites offering writers great exposure (exposure to whom they never say) instead of paying them.

And even worse than that is people charging writers a fee just to send their work to them, whether it’s published or not. I find this the biggest scam of all, especially when it’s an unknown publication, or worse, an ‘online publication’ which, for the uninitiated, means it’s a website or blog.

Just a couple of weeks ago I came across a Facebook post asking for fiction submissions. I clicked through the link to ‘learn more’ and found it was someone who had only recently set up a website, had no content whatsoever, and were wanting gullible writers to send in stories so they could upload them to their website for free. In other words, they would make money from the stories, while the writers continued to write all the content for their site and get nothing.

What a scam.

Yet so many would-be and newbie writers fall for this. And how much ‘exposure’ will they get from an unknown website that no one’s ever heard  of?

I’ve challenged some of these websites owners and they always (and I mean ALWAYS) come back with the same excuse as to why they refuse to pay writers. They all say it’s because they have to keep up with the cost of running a website (which can be done for free or as cheap as $100/year) and they have to use their valuable time to read the submissions.

Did you get that? Their time is valuable but the writers’ time isn’t.

My advice to anyone looking to write for free is, don’t cheapen yourself.

No doubt there’ll be those who tell me I’m wrong, but I know that I’m right when I say that writing for free for an unknown publication/website, or for an unknown person who wants to publish an anthology, will only benefit whoever is earning money from your work AND they’ll keep earning money from it for years.

I have never worked for free and I never intend to. And neither should you.

The Monthly Challenge Writing Series:

Book 1 - Quick Cash Freelance Writing

I don’t believe in being a starving writer and neither should you.

That’s why this is the first book in a four-part series of how to write and earn money.

In this first book I take you step-by-step through Seven different ways to earn money fast as a freelance writer and this information comes from my own years of experience and success as a freelancer.

https://www.cheritonhousepublishing.com/books/MCWS1.html

When the S**t Won’t Stop Hitting the Fan

The kind of life I prefer is one without hassles and problems, easy-breezy and cruisey,  and that is how I always try and live. I don’t go out drinking, don’t do drugs, and in fact, I don’t like socialising and avoid it at all costs. And I don’t like having people in my home, especially overnight guests. My food is plain, not fancy.

Yet lately it’s been one difficult situation after another, and this has been going on for over a year. Even something simple like taking an item back to a store because it was faulty turned into having to go to mediation, a local tribunal hearing (which we won but weren’t paid), and then we had to lodge the matter with the magistrate court and began enforcement proceedings against the store owner, when he suddenly had a change of heart and paid us. He also had to pay our costs too so it ended costing him a lot. But how did something so simple like a store refund take months to sort out?

But this is only one example of how things have gone bad repeatedly. We also suffered a sudden death in the family, had other family issues going on, and because of reasons beyond our control we now have to move from the apartment where we live, which again it’s another legal battle over something that should have been an easy fix.

STRESS!

Naturally, dealing with all this has taken it’s toll on me. I feel physically and mentally exhausted, not to mention the hours/days/weeks I’ve spent filling out forms, writing out statements, visiting with our lawyer, sending emails back and forth… it all takes so much time and is exhausting.

To have the time to concentrate on all this, I’ve had to cut back on some things, one of which is my writing. I’ve also started napping a lot, which I think is just to block it all out, but it’s a habit I’m overcoming because I don’t want to sleep my life away.

But, through it all, I’ve also been giving a lot of thought as to the direction I want my writing to take.

I used to write a lot about blogging, marketing, copywriting, and other areas in that same vein of making money from writing, because these are things I’m good at. But then I started to change direction (because I was listening to too many so-called writing ‘experts’) and tried to go more towards subjects about how to write.

With hindsight, I’m annoyed with my own stupidity, because I don’t enjoy writing about how to write. I used to assume that anyone reading my stuff already knew how to write. They just want to earn more and be successful with it. I’ve also taken to doing more fiction writing (again, from listening to too many writing ‘gurus’).

I’ve been wondering for a while now why I’m writing less and less. I used to be actively writing every day but for a while now I’ve been knuckle-dragging my way to my computer and my notebooks every morning. And for a long time now I’ve had no idea why. I even thought that maybe it was an age thing and that the older I get (over 60 now, yikes!) the less I feel like writing. I also thought it might be with all the stuff going on in my life.

After giving it plenty of thought, or at least trying to, but my crazy monkey-mind often struggles to concentrate on one thing at a time, I realised my reluctance is because I’m not enjoying the writing I’m doing. It’s not horrible, it’s just not as much fun so my incentive has been waning. 

The thing is, we’re all different, so what’s good for one person isn’t good for all. How boring would life be if we were all the same? So if one person thrives on writing stories while others love to write non-fiction, that’s okay. It’s the same with my writing. I can’t please everyone because everyone wants different things.

I also used to write in different niches and had several different websites and blogs, and I gave that all away. When the industry changed, I thought I had to change with it. But I don’t. I can do whatever I want. If I’d kept all my websites they’d probably still be doing well.

Over the years I’ve ‘ummed and ahhhed' over whether to keep doing my monthly newsletter. I’ve even stopped and started it up again a few times. But now I’ve decided to let it go once and for all because, although it was an entertaining and informative read, it took a lot of time to put together, not many people were clicking on any of the links, and when I did the math, the time spent wasn’t worth the small income gained.

So I’m going back to what I do best and hopefully it will help a lot of people like it always used to do.

I’ll still write the novels I have planned, but I won’t make fiction writing the main focus of my business any more.

I’ve also organised a writing schedule for myself and it’s the best one ever, because I get more done without needing more time. Super productivity. And being productive makes me happy.

My plan also includes getting back to regular article writing and blogging so you should be hearing more from me soon. And the plan also includes writing useable, interesting and entertaining content.

Maybe I should heed the advice of Eleanor Roosevelt who said:

"Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't."