Don't Say Yes When You Want To Say No

We've all been there.

Someone asks you to do something you don't want to do, yet you agree to do it.

Or someone wants to do something but they need your permission (like one off your kids), so you say yes even though you want to say no.

So why do we do it?

It's usually to avoid bad feelings, friction, or conflict.

Yet the truth is that people won't like you more or give you more respect, if you say yes all the time instead of standing up for what you really want.

And at the same time, saying no is empowering. It won't make you popular, but it will help you to set boundaries of what you will and won't do.

Best of all, you only have to say no once, and it's easy to do it every time after that.

But...you may be wondering what this has to do with writing?

Saying no to things you don't want to do opens up more time for the things you DO want to do and for the things that are important to you.

And that means more time for writing.

Sure your friends will be annoyed with you if you tell them you don't want to go out drinking with them because you want to stay home and work on your novel instead, but who's life is it?

And if anyone pressures you for an immediate answer to something, but you don't want to say yes, or you're unsure, just say "I'll have to think about it." And if they still pressure you tell them "If you want an answer right now, it will have to be no. But if you give me time, I'll think about it." (This works amazingly well with teenagers in the family.) :)

Don't let time-vampires steal any more of your time.

If you'd rather be writing, go and do that and say no to the unimportant things or stuff you'd really rather not do at all.

And if you want more inspiration read the short viral article written by Derek Sivers, "No “yes.” Either “HELL YEAH!” or “no.”

Then get back to writing.

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Writing Forums. Helpful or Not?

Lately I’ve been taking somewhat of an interest in writing forums.

Why?

Because they’re regularly touted as one of the best places for writers to hang out and learn their craft.

Many years ago, while I was quite new to being a writer (but I was already earning a decent income from it), I joined a couple of writing forums.

What I found was that most of the people on these forums weren’t writers at all.

Most were wannabes who had never (and probably never would) write anything publishable at all.

Quite a few others were just trolls.

It only took me a few weeks to realise what was going on and get the hell out of there.

But lately I wondered if anything had changed.

So I took a look around and scanned through a few forums looking at the threads and all the responses.

And you know what?

Nothing had changed.

No matter where I looked, each forum was dominated by people either responding to questions with useless advice because they weren’t professional writers and so had no clue what they were talking about, or they were nasty trolls just hanging around trying to upset people.

But do you know what amazed me the most?

It was how much time these people were spending on these forums.

It seemed that they spent hours every day posting new topics, answering questions, and getting into arguments.

There were even people who seemed to be on the forums 24/7 and had tens of thousands of posts and comments and thousands of followers.

One poster actually had well over 67,000 posts that he’d uploaded over his 10 year membership which averaged out at over 18 posts a day. Imagine that! Posting 18 times a day - or more -  to the same forum for 10 years.

And the funny thing about all this was that the threads that received the most responses were the ones where people were asking about how to earn money from writing.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

I found this hilarious because how can anyone who spends most of their time on free forums dishing out advice about how to make money from writing, actually have the time to make money from writing?

The irony just has me in stitches because let’s face it, anyone making money from writing is writing and getting their work published, not hanging around writing forums. Have you ever heard a successful writer saying how they spent hours and hours every day on writing forums and it helped get them to where they are today?

No doubt there will be some who think that writing forums are great and that’s why they’re always on them. But it’s also the reason why they’re not successful writers.

Successful writers are busy writing.

My advice to anyone who wants to earn money from their writing is to “Just Do It,” as the Nike slogan says.

Writing time is best spent writing and if you don’t know where to start or what to write next, try a writing course like Quick Cash Writing that gets you earning money from your writing  fast.

Or look at my Writing Markets page for new places for writing submissions.

Or how about downloading How to Write Any Book in 28 Days or Less so that you can get to work straight away writing your next best seller.

Writing is work, not a hobby.

No writing = no publishing = no money.

So don’t spend your time hanging out on forums all day.

Find a way to start work quickly and get down to some serious writing.

Just Do It.

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7 Ways to Make Writing Easier

Guest post:

 By Ben Settle


A few weeks ago, I received an interesting comment from someone who wanted to hire me to write an ad, and one of the things she said was I make writing seem "effortless." Which I found kind of ironic.

Why?

Because the reality is I don't find writing effortless at all. I find it extremely hard. I actually HATE writing. In fact, to quote the late, great copywriter Sir Gary of Halbert: "Writing sucks!"

But... since it pays the bills I do it anyway. And thank God there ARE ways to make it easier (and even fun). Below are just a few of these ways...

1. Write every day

Hey, it may sound corny, but it really is true the more you do something, the easier and more "routine" it gets.

2. Write like you talk

If you can talk, you can write. I know of one person who writes entire BOOKS just by reading into a recorder while driving around and then transcribing it.

3. Don't try to impress anyone

Forget pleasing other writers or copywriters or whatever. Say what needs saying and let the chips fall wherever they may. Yes... some people WILL whine and complain. Might as well expect it. But most will love you for it and even become your biggest fans.

4. Be "real"

Be YOU and not a warmed-over version of someone else. Frankly, it makes writing easier, faster and more persuasive.

5. Keep it pithy

When in doubt... snip it out.

6. Tell stories

This is the EASIEST way to write. It's also the easiest way for people to remember your message. Even memory training experts teach putting everything in story format because it makes it easier for peoples' brains to remember and "process" information.

7. Respect peoples' time

This is a biggie. One reason ads, emails, blogs, etc are ignored is because people are too busy to be bothered reading them. And if you simply respect your readers' time (like for example, by being pithy), they'll be FAR more likely to hear you out (and, yes, buy). Anyway, those are some "tried and true" ideas for making writing a lot easier.

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For more ways to make writing easier check out the free tips at: http://bensettle.com