There's No Such Thing As a Friend, Especially When You're a Writer

These days the media is full of advice about we all need friends and how important it is for us all to have a support group we can turn to.

But do we? And is there really such a thing as a friend?

I have plenty of acquaintances and people that I often talk to, but I wouldn't say I actually have any friends. In fact, I don't think anyone really knows what a friend is.

People tell me that if someone is your friend, then you are obligated in the following ways:

- if they ask you to do them a favour, you have to do it or they'll consider you not their friend

- you have to 'be there' for them when they have a problem and you either have to listen to them talk about it or do something to help them.

- if they have a favourite charity or their kids are doing a school fundraiser, you have to donate or get involved if they ask you to

- if they have strong political views, you have to agree with them or keep quiet

And the thing is, if you let them down on just one of these things, they won't want to know you anymore.

This is why I always say that there is no such thing as a friend. They're an obligation. That may sound harsh, but it's true. It's not that I have anything against people, I just don't consider anyone as my friend and I try not to get heavily involved with anyone's life, but I don't mind talking to people I like.

I found this especially true when I quit my job and became a writer. Many people I considered friends said I was a fool to give up a good job and that I'd never earn money writing. A few even ridiculed me for my decision, and some even said that they'd always thought about being a writer, but well... they just didn't have the time to try and write. It just seemed like so much jealousy. 

But if I'm honest, it was probably me that turned away from them at that point because I was busy on my writing mission and didn't have time for their negativity and snide remarks.

It was around that time that I realised how fickle friendships are. At first it made me a bit sad. But then I figured that having friends makes you needy because you feel like you don't just WANT them as friends, but you NEED them.

Since then, I've just kept light relationships with others and immersed myself in my writing.

What if you had a mission to turn to instead of needing others? You could close the door on the world and spend time on your mission. And your mission can be whatever you want it to be - creative, business, charity, religion, education, invention, or so many other things.

I found that having a mission has given me more confidence, self-esteem and enabled me to live my life on my own terms, doing what I want to do.

Start living your life on your own terms by pursuing your own True Life Mission.

https://ruthiswriting.com/books/MCFL.html

Momentum, Motivation, Energy. How to Have All 3 Instantly

When you read anything about the struggles writers face, one that comes up again and again is getting started. So many of us find it so darn hard to actually sit down and have more bum-in-chair time.

But that can be the same for just about any activity. It's not the doing it that's hard, it's the getting started.

So wouldn't it be wonderful if, whenever you wanted to write, you could just click your fingers and instantly have the momentum, motivation and energy to sit and write for hours?

Well, surprisingly, you can.

You see it's too easy to think that you have to wait for the trinity of momentum, motivation and energy to show up before you can write.

But the opposite is true. You don't wait for them before you can start writing. You start writing and then they show up.

If you spend your days not moving, or doing very little, then you'll always feel like not doing anything. 

Laziness is an all too easy habit to cultivate.

Momentum must be created every day.

How?

With planning and consistency.

You need to schedule everything, and follow through by doing it.

Don't feel like going to the gym? Go anyway.

Once you get moving (whether you're at the gym working out or your at your desk writing) momentum will kick in and you'll soon have unstoppable motivation and energy.

After a few weeks, it will be a habit.

And this is the same with anything. Whatever it is you want to do, whether you feel like it or not, do it every day. No matter what.

Plan to take action. Then do it daily.

Starting is the key to momentum, motivation and energy.

And be consistent.

Living The Laptop Lifestyle:
How To Start & Grow A Profitable Online Business So You Can Quit Your Job

https://ruthiswriting.com/books/LLS.html

This is What You Must Know To Write More and Earn More

I wrote a blog post last week about a great little ebook I bought called Writing a Book a Week: How to Write Quick Books Under the Self-Publishing Model. I wrote about this ebook because it was such a short and yet information-packed little book, and I have to say that I really prefer books like this, that get straight to the point and aren't full of useless "filler" content.

I found some of the information really useful because it contained information about a few things that I hadn't thought about before, even though I've been writing and publishing books for years.

This ebook was so short that it took me less than an hour to read. So I read it twice.

Then I decided I wanted to delve even deeper into it, so I sat and typed it out and then printed it (but only for my own reference). I do this sometimes if a book is small and I want to look at it deeper because I need to do this on paper. I find it hard to study a document on screen.

And this ebook was less than 10,000 words because I didn't need all the prelim pages or the TOC. I just wanted a copy of the chapters.

I feel I should add here that I'm a fast typist so I had the ebook typed and printed in just a couple of hours.

Once I'd finished I went through my printed copy, highlighting and making notes all over it. It was a fascinating exercise.

But this is what you have to do if you're a writer. You have to study your craft and find out everything you need to know.

To come as far as I have, it's taken me years to learn all about building websites, SEO, marketing, publishing, time management, and much more. I even had to learn exactly which type of computer I needed and all the software I needed to be able to work faster and easier. I even hire others to do some of the work for me.

But this is what it takes to be a successful writer. It's not all about the actual writing. It's also about learning, absorbing and buying/hiring anything I need, including website-building software and (sometimes) freelancers.

If I don't spend time doing these things then I can't do my work. 

So if there's something you need to move your writing career along, don't be hesitant about buying it or studying it.

I always find that no matter how much I learn and how much I know, there's always more to know and learn because things change all the time.

Just don't sell yourself short.

Writing a Book a Week: 

How to Write Quick Books Under the Self-Publishing Model.

https://amzn.to/35sKRzf

The Book That is Changing Lives in a Locked-Down World

 In this never-ending age of lock-downs and restrictions on where we can go and what we can do, here in Australia we've faired better than most, even though in the southern state of Victoria, they've had to endure more unnecessary lock-downs and mask-wearing more than in the rest of the country. Where I live in Queensland, we've had very little to contend with for the past few months. Yet still, everyone is just so sick and tired of restrictions and not being able to live our normal lives and all the protests and empty supermarket shelves.

Yet prior to any of this happening, I wrote a book called Mission Critical For Life, and this book is all about how having a mission can help you live your own life on your own terms. And it turned out to be perfect for living in this dystopian society we now find ourselves in.

In this book I covered:

1. How having a mission means you can go home and close the door on the rest of the world and work on your mission. I even explained what a mission is and how you can discover your own. This information has been super helpful for so many people over the past year and a half.

2. How simple it is to make sure you have enough money so that you can stay home and not need to come out or go to work for a year or more. Having this financial security can be helpful in so many ways. Not just because you don't have to worry in case you lose your job, but also because it gives you emotional security knowing that when things get too much you can survive for months or years. This also provides self-esteem.

3. Having a mission and being able to turn to it means that you don't need friends. I find socialising emotionally draining and I can only be around other people for short bursts of time, and even then I'm glad to go home and be away from them. And having my mission to escape to, means that I'm not needy of other people's attention.

Mission Critical For Life also dives even deeper than this and shows you exactly how having a mission can improve your life in ways you can't even imagine. 

Most people spend their time looking at how to "fill" their time every day after they've finished working at a job they hate.

But having a mission means that you won't have to work at a job you hate or work for a boss you can't stand. And best of all, you won't be running around looking for time-wasting activities, or being needy of other people or wondering how to "fill" your time. Instead you'll be "spending" your time doing something you enjoy.

And if you'd known all this during these past few months when we've all had to stay home more, then you could have been making the most of it by spending your time on your mission.

All those who bought the book faired better during this dark, unusual time in our lives because they were happy to stay home.

The good news is that it's not too late.

You can still get your own copy of Mission Critical For Life.

And once you read it you'll realise how simple it is to find your own mission and start living life on your own terms.

https://ruthiswriting.com/books/MCFL.html